Slip came for a visit and brought me lunch today. Falafel from Wolf & Bear. She also gave me the chance to run errands. I went to the bank, the post office, the library, and the grocery store. She stayed for quite a while and kept me company. We talked about aprons and bicycles, among other things.
Today was the most unresponsive Grandma has been. Slip tried to talk to her, but Grandma couldn't even focus her eyes on Slip and she didn't say anything. It was a little unnerving.
At the grocery store I felt especially sad when I realized there was nothing I could take back for Grandma. Yesterday she had a few bites of ice cream, today a few bites of applesauce. Usually I'll get her something sweet--a pastry or chocolate--as a surprise, but she won't eat any of that now. The candy she insisted on Monday is still on the counter, minus one Hershey bar. It really hit me.
I am good about containing myself around Grandma and around others, but when I get alone outside the house, mostly when I am driving in the car, I sometimes lose it a little. Especially now that it's so close. And the person she was is essentially already gone.